At some point in your life you may have asked yourself this question ?

Was your answer, Bob Smith ? Of course that is just an example. Does your first name followed by your last name fully define YOU? My last name changed when I got married. My first name has a nice meaning but is widely mispronounced and misspelled since my childhood. The point I am trying to make here is, I am not what I am addressed as. My name belongs to me. It is not “me”.

OK, let me try again. Am I my physical body ? I am already biting my tongue as I know that it is a lame guess. Do I ever say “I am my shirt” or “I am my ring.” Think of body as a costume that we are wearing. We drive it. If you are familiar with kids shows like Sesame Street or Barney, we are just like a person in a Barney or Big Bird costume giving life to the character. In many cases, the body gives us a clue to our character. But sometimes people mutate their body through artificial means and portray a look unlike themselves. The real person hides himself in a new look. I was inspired by the thoughts of the Sikh girl, recently featured in Yahoo news, who accepted her body as it came to her. It is very interesting to me that when I am just being myself, I have had people call me “sunshine”, which happens to be the English translation of my first name. However, having said all that, my outward description is not exactly “me”. When the living person acting the part takes off his costume what is left behind is just a bunch of colored cloth, feathers etc. When I leave my body, I will leave behind a mass of flesh, skin and bones. Oops..my body is not “me”.

I am going for Try #3. Am I mind ? My thoughts come and go. I remember as a child I used to play cricket with boys. As I grew older I started to think of boys differently. Can you think of something that you used to do long time ago in your childhood. I bet you can. The mind has memory that strings the changing thoughts and emotions together. At this point I will venture to ask “What happens to the person suffering from Alzheimers’ disorder? ” She is alive. However, she is not able to remember many things in the present and past. Does that mean she has lost herself ? This is debatable….

In conclusion, my attempts at answering the question “Who am I ?” has led to interesting information but not the real answer. It is just the beginning. The search continues…INSIDE.

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